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Perfectionism vs. Healthy Striving
We as leaders may think perfectionism will shield us from criticism, but it actually prevents deeper learning, growth and connection.
In leadership, it often feels like we’re balancing the pressure to perform perfectly with the need to be authentic.
As renowned researcher and author Dr. Brené Brown explains, perfectionism is not about excellence — it's a heavy shield we use to protect ourselves from judgment.
"We struggle with perfectionism in areas where we feel most vulnerable to shame," Brown explains.
But what exactly is perfectionism? To Brown, it’s a 20-ton shield.
"It's a way of thinking that says this: 'If I look perfect, live perfect, work perfect, I can avoid or minimize criticism, blame and ridicule,'" she says.
Perfectionism is not the same as striving to be your best. Perfectionism feels like protection, but it's really rooted in fear.
"When perfectionism is driving, shame is always riding shotgun — and fear is the annoying backseat driver," Brown explains.
We as leaders may think perfectionism will shield us from criticism, but it actually prevents deeper learning, growth and connection.
Instead of leading freely, perfectionists become fixated on avoiding mistakes and appearing to have it all together, ultimately making them less relatable and approachable.
Realize there’s a key difference between healthy striving and perfectionism:
Perfectionism is externally driven — focused on what others think. It’s a mindset of, "What will people think and say?"
Healthy striving is internally driven — about being your best for yourself and your team. It focuses on growth, not fear of judgment.
Leaders who embrace healthy ambition in their daily lives and within their organizations accept their own humanity, as well as that of those they lead to be seen.
Leadership isn’t about being perfect — it’s about being real. Brown has spent decades reminding us, "Vulnerability is the birthplace of innovation, creativity, and change."
Today, let's release some of the pressures of the perfectionist mindset and replace it with a healthy striving attitude that's internally driven.
At the end of the day, ask yourself: Did I give my best effort and improve by 1 percent in some aspect of my game or craft?
This approach will humanize us, encouraging deeper self-reflection and fostering a more nurturing relationship with both yourself and those you lead.
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