The Gratitude Shift: From 'Grateful For' to 'Grateful In'

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The word gratitude has become a cultural buzzword. Especially during the holiday season, we’re surrounded by reminders to practice gratitude—in conversations, social media posts, and even the way we lead our lives.

Research consistently shows that gratitude improves our well-being and enhances our sense of fulfillment. It’s indeed a powerful practice that grounds us in appreciation and the present.

Yet, how often do we reduce gratitude to a simple checklist of things we’re "grateful for"?

If we pause and reflect on this common phrase—grateful for—it raises a deeper question: Is gratitude reserved only for the good moments? For the wins? For the easy, joyful parts of life?

The reality is far more nuanced, as life, as you well know, isn’t always filled with sunshine and celebrations. We face losses, setbacks, and moments that shake us to our core. The big game we lose. The job we’re unexpectedly let go from. The relationship we fought so hard to save, only to watch it slip away. The dreaded news from the doctor we never wanted to hear.

In those moments, can we really be grateful for what has happened? Likely not. And that’s okay. But here’s the challenge—and the opportunity: What if we shifted our mindset from being grateful for to being grateful in?

The Shift: Grateful In

This paradigm shift from grateful for to grateful in allows us to see life’s difficulties not as obstacles but as opportunities. Opportunities to learn, to evolve, to heal, to let go, to discover and to find new meaningful paths forward.

Being grateful in doesn’t deny reality. It doesn’t dismiss the pain or sugarcoat the struggle. Instead, it acknowledges the storm while choosing to root ourselves in courage and resilience. It helps us ask not “Why me?” but “Why not me?” It’s an invitation to find deeper meaning and purpose, even amidst the storm and in our darkest moments.

When we embrace being grateful in, we open ourselves to the paradoxes of life—the joy and the pain, the victories and the losses, the rebirths and the endings. Gratitude in these moments is not about liking the hardship but about finding grace within it. It’s about grounding ourselves in the belief that even the most challenging chapters of our journey have something to teach us, and that life isn't happening to us; it's happening for us.

For many of us, 2024 has been a year of extremes. The highs have felt exhilarating, and the lows have been profoundly difficult. Yet, we are still here. In this precious moment, we have a sacred opportunity to practice gratitude—not for the highs and lows, but in the experience of navigating them.

As we move through the holiday season, let’s take a moment to reflect on this shift from grateful for to grateful in. Let’s recognize the beauty that exists in life’s dualities: in joy and suffering, in beginnings and endings, in the dreaded news and the anticipated celebrations.

Life, leadership, and self-discovery are rarely linear; they form a mosaic of moments that invite us to look inward and transform. When we embrace the duality of these moments with groundedness, grace, and gratitude, we step into our power as leaders and positive difference-makers.

When we model bravery and resilience, and share our whole hearts with others, we unlock a deeper well of strength and perspective within ourselves.

This season, take some time to pause. Reflect. Breathe. Rejoice—and check in with yourself.

And when you do, ask yourself: What would it look like to be grateful in, rather than grateful for? 

You might find that this simple shift transforms not only how you navigate the holidays but also how you approach the journey ahead.

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