When Emotions Take the Wheel: A Lesson from Kobe Bryant

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Each of us, as leaders and as human beings, are on a journey—a hero’s journey. Each day, we navigate uncharted terrain, facing tests and trials, setbacks and triumphs. Over time, we evolve. We transform. But we don’t make this journey alone.

Riding with us are our emotions—the ones we’ve acknowledged and the ones we’ve buried. Sometimes they’re in the backseat. Other times, they’re in the passenger seat. And occasionally, without proper warning, they take the wheel.

What happens in those very human moments when our emotions overpower our will, hijack our decision-making, and start steering us? When fear, doubt, or insecurity drives us to stay too long in a role, relationship, or environment we’ve outgrown—or keeps us from stepping boldly into our next chapter, even as we feel pulled in that direction?

It’s happened to the best of us.

The late Kobe Bryant—five-time NBA Champion, two-time Olympic Gold Medalist, Oscar winner, and relentless pursuer of excellence—understood this deeply. Kobe had an unmatched commitment to growth. He let the process, the daily discipline, the competitive fire, and the Mamba Mentality compound over days, weeks, months, years, and decades. His journey was one of emotional mastery just as much as it was physical, tactical, and about maximizing his talent.

Before his tragic passing in 2020, Kobe sat down with Jay Shetty on the On Purpose podcast. Their conversation offered rare insights into how to be strategic, driven, and aligned with your purpose. But one moment stood out: a reflection on the role of emotion in performance, leadership, and life.

Kobe shared:

“What I try to do is just try to be still and understand that things come and go. Emotions come and go. The important thing is to accept them all, to embrace them all. And then you can choose what to do with them, versus being controlled by them.”

He went on to explain that, as a young player, he believed emotions like fear and nervousness were weaknesses. That mindset didn’t make them go away—it only magnified them. It wasn’t until he chose to face them with greater curiosity, rather than shame, that they lost their power over him.

“What am I afraid of? And then you unpack it… and it gives you the ability to look at it for what it really is—which is nothing more than your imagination running its course.”

There’s profound wisdom here—timely and timeless—for us as leaders and high performers navigating uncertainty, adversity, or simply the demands of daily life.

Rather than resisting fear, lean into curiosity: ‘What am I afraid of?’
Rather than denying nerves, embrace them: ‘Yes, I’m nervous—why?’
And rather than judging yourself for having human emotions, choose to observe and engage with them.

As leaders, we don’t need to suppress our emotions. We don’t need to always have it together, always be ‘on,’ or always be okay. And we don’t need to let emotion dictate our choices either. Instead, we can learn to partner with it—feeling fear, honoring it, and still choosing courage. Acknowledging doubt, and still leading with clarity.

Every day and every moment, we are in more control than we think. Our minds will often try to bully our bodies into believing every worry. Our emotions will try to take the steering wheel on our journey of leadership and personal transformation. But our power lies in our response—our ability to breathe, take a step back, and be still.

Yes, there will be moments when the journey challenges us. That’s part of the beauty of living—and the art of leading.

But if we can learn to sit with stillness, find peace in the silence, listen deeply, and decipher the noise and chatter, we unlock the power to lead not just with excellence and mastery, but with greater presence, grace, and emotional truth.

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